Double Standard. In San Francisco, members of the vice squad, preparing a pandering case, were shaken to discover that after posing as a businessman, luring two call girls to his hotel room and arresting them as material witnesses, Inspector John O'Haire took a second look at one of the girls, eloped to Reno and married her.

Letter of the Law. In Chatham, England, deciding to play it safe after downing three pints of beer at a local pub, Charles Spinner pushed his motor bike home instead of riding it, was fined $14 anyway and had his license suspended for a year for "being drunk in charge of a motor vehicle."

Return Engagement. In Philadelphia, Trolley Operator Edward Palumbo identified Walter Green as the man who had grabbed his bag containing change on the outbound trip, jumped off the car, waited for Palumbo to return on his inbound trip, hopped aboard again and snatched Palumbo's money changer.

The Courtship. In Roanoke, Va., Charles Lee Dickerson, 71, made up his mind at last, married Mrs. Martha Shelton, 70, whose father had frightened him into breaking off their engagement 52 years ago.

On Principle. In McKeesport, Pa., after someone stole the police blotter from the police station, Chief James Loizes explained why he was irritated: "Not because the book was valuable. But I don't like the idea of someone being able to walk in here and walk out again with something like that."

Pros. In Stuttgart, Germany, seven counterfeiters were arrested after it was noticed that the 5-mark pieces they were making were of far better quality than legitimate ones.

Absentee Ballots. In Umatilla, Ore., city fathers pondered the necessity of holding another mayoralty election after the official canvass showed that 361 votes had been cast--19 more than the total number of registered voters.

Cold Comfort. In Klamath Falls, Ore., Housewife Pearl Ray, treated for second-and third-degree burns, complained bitterly that while she was away from home at a party, "someone had played a dirty trick" by building a fire in a normally cold kitchen wood range on which she was accustomed to sitting.

Spectator Sport. In Pasco, Wash., Motorist Lonnie Stephens took his eyes from the road to watch a man landing a fish, drove over an embankment and almost into the Columbia River, got a ticket for inattention to driving from the fisherman, a state patrolman.

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