A SAHL'S-EYE VIEW: The Unfabulous Fifties

Publication of Yalta Papers: They should come in a loose-leaf binder so you can add new betrayals as they come along.

Korea: The turncoats were steadfast. They refused to give anything except their name, rank and the exact position of their unit.

Ike's First Election: We need a man on a white horse. Well, we got the horse, but there's nobody on him.

All-Purpose Answer to Accusations by Senator McCarthy: I didn't mean to be subversive, but I was new in this community and I wanted to meet the girls.

Un-American Activities Committee: Every time the Russians throw an American in jail, the committee throws an American in jail to get even.

The AEC Lifts J. Robert Oppenheimer's Security Clearance: All right. Doctor, turn in your brain.

Folk Singers: They wear velvet shirts open to the navel. But they have no navels. This is the ultimate rejection of mother.

Robert Sarnoff Appointed Chairman of NBC: It's a great American success story. He started with native ability, and suddenly his father took a liking to him.

Neil McElroy Appointed Secretary of Defense: A great blow to daytime radio.

Lung-Cancer Tests: There is a moral question here--whether or not mice should smoke.

Nixon in Russia: If he doesn't get along with them, he'll be in trouble, because over there he can't call anyone a Communist and hurt their career.

Missile Gap: Maybe the Russians will steal all our secrets. Then they'll be two years behind.

Cape Canaveral: Disneyland East.

Bomb Tests: Contamination without representation.

1958 Democratic Landslide: The election wiped me out. There wasn't anything left to talk about because we have Utopia. With Byrd, Eastland and Faubus, what can go wrong? Nelson Rockefeller: He is promising that if elected he will give the kids Little League polo.

1960 Democratic Civil-Rights Plank: You shouldn't send a kid up on a plank like that.

Kennedy Entertains Mboya at Hyannisport: But will he mix with him off the job?

Kennedy Nomination: The Democratic Advisory Council sent a wire to Joseph Kennedy stating "You haven't lost a son, you've gained a country."

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